Got off the train in Paris Montparnasse cold as a motherfucker. My Canadian mindset had gotten the best of me, causing me to wear a flannel instead of an actual real life warm piece of outerwear. (The flannel was Needles…drip was still intact, worry not.) Stepped outside the train station and made my way to a diner I had found online because I haven’t had good old Americanized pancakes and bacon in months and I needed some maple syrup coursing through my veins. Diner was closed, not very sicko-mode, but alas this was the first in a long string of events of me not checking times and being a Fool. Made my way further down the road and got a bagel with salmon lox and an espresso and I was content.  Times to see some fucking art! Let’s go to the Dali museum and see some Surrealism. Dali museum is closed? On Thursday? Picasso museum it is! The Louvre is going to be too crowded and predictable.

So ya boy walks an hour and a half to the Picasso museum just in time for the beautiful gates  to open and reveal the scent of Old Canvas and new overpriced merch: beautiful. I enter the sanctimonious shrine to the life of Pablo and the fresh-faced desk lady tells me that students studying in France can hang out for the low low price of free. Hell yeah. I walk towards the main exhibition, which is a comparative look at the works of Pablo Picasso and Alexander Calder.

The first piece that caught my eye when I stepped into the exhibition space was Picasso’s “The Straw Hat with Blue Foliage,”  which depicts a woman with a heart shaped head and an unevenly placed hat. A part of this particular piece that I appreciate is the juxtaposition in colour  between light pastel purples, greens, and blues that contrast the harsh, darker tones of the burgundy used in the background.

On to Calder, who before this exhibition I was unfamiliar with,  but am now a fan and admirer of the late French artist. The piece that spoke to me the loudest from Calder is titled “Pink Elephant with Pink People” which showcases a hellish, chaotic scene with baby-like pink and harsh black lines.

Finally, Picasso’s “Le Sculpteur” from 1931 was presented in a very open space with copious amounts of natural light on the top floor of the palace-turned-museum. “Le Sculpteur” spoke to me the most out of Pablo’s larger works due to the harsh, comic book-like linework combined with the use of pastel colors. The line work and complimentary colors all seem so deliberately calculated.

Left the Picasso museum feeling content and full of artistic inspiration, time for my tattoo appointment. Walked through almost the entirety of Paris to Treiz Ink where I met Mind Your Bones aka Robin aka Young Punk McQueen. Robin looked like Alexander McQueen post-liposuction; he was wearing a grey ribbed tank top, painter jeans, and heavy-duty combat boots, despite the lack of designer labels the fit was on point. Touché Robin, touché.  At this point my newly anointed iPhone 5s was nearly dead so I threw her on the charger in the tattoo studio and laid down for 5 hours while Robin zapped a beautiful portrait of Ian Curtis onto my pale, punk-ass skin. JOY DIVISION

Left the tattoo studio and thought I had time to go to Shakespeare and Company, a famous English vintage bookstore in the heart of Paris. To my disappointment, the rare and vintage section of Shakespeare and Company was closed, so I was left browsing a half assed French version of your lame local chain bookstore,  causing me to miss my bus. When I got to the first bus station, my phone was at 7% and my portable charger was dead, so I ordered an uber just before my phone bit the dust.  Then I purchased a ticket to a second bus at a second bus station, paying an exorbitant amount. Needless to say I was stressing, but I made it to the station and back to Nantes somehow by 5 O’clock in the morning.

And finally the fit because we all know I cannot go to an art museum or Paris or literally anywhere for Christ’s sake and not get a fit off. That is sacrilegious and the fit gods would send me straight to hell, damned to brick the rest of my fits for all of eternity. SO what did I wear, you ask? I woke up at 5 in the morning and still looked like a Buttery-Goth-Ninja-Japanese-Artisanal-Fusion so you best appreciate the finesse.

Shoes: Rick Owens Drkshdw Nylon Ramones

Pants: Rick Owens Memphis Jeans

Under Shirt: Wings + Horns Pocket Tee

Flannel: Needles Rebuild Ribbon Flannel

Jewelry: Bracelet by Alexander McQueen. Ring and Earring by The Great Frog